FOR WE ARE...
CREEPING LINE AHEAD
OUT NOW
THINGS THAT CAME BEFORE
EMPORIUM OF FABULOUS THINGS
You know we haven’t got our merch act together yet. But when we do, you’ll find it here
YOUR MERCHANTS OF NOISE
Formed at some point after electricity but before anybody involved had developed a proper exit strategy, Creeping Line Ahead is a four-headed entertainment hazard forged entirely of heavy metal, West Country steel.
There be riffs, there be odd time signatures, there be suspiciously flamboyant garments, and there is absolutely no guarantee that any of it was necessary. BUT…
Be warned: bring spare socks, for the ones you wear shall be rocked clean off.
Matt
Vocals
Matt is the voice of the band. Found mostly at the front of the stage, he sings with the confidence of a man who has personally stitched his own flares and then decided the world was finally ready for them.
His trousers are homemade and vary wildly in pattern, material and legality. Some are floral. Some are your Nan’s cords. Some appear to have been cut from curtains recovered from a wizard’s caravan. All of them flare with the sort of authority normally reserved for emergency beacons and mating birds.
He is partial to Live Action Role Play weekends, where his natural gifts for costume, projection and standing in a field looking important are finally recognised by people called Thargorn.
Matt’s favourite runway is probably grass. His favourite fabric is whatever that is.
Sturge
Bass Guitar
Sturge occupies the low end, which is appropriate, because he plays bass with the calm authority of a man who has looked deep into the abyss and decided it could do with more Billy Sheehan.
When not operating the bottom end of the band, Sturge is a hand-poke tattoo artist, delicately introducing ink to skin one tiny stab at a time. His technique is patient, precise and only mildly alarming to people who have just realised the machine is not broken, there simply isn’t one.
His spiritual bass father is Billy Sheehan, whose name Sturge speaks only in reverent tones, usually while staring into the middle distance and wondering whether it is acceptable to add a 14-minute solo to a song that is technically about bins.
Christian’s favourite fish is probably low-end. His favourite dog is aerodynamic.
Craig
Drums
Craig is the drummer, which means he can usually be found at the back, quiet, unassuming, and almost entirely surrounded by cymbals. Some drummers use cymbals for musical punctuation. Craig uses them for shelter, emotional support and, if necessary, a small defensive perimeter.
During gigs, Craig spends much of his evening staring directly at Matt’s arse, which has given him a unique perspective on show business and an enviable understanding of homemade flares from the rear.
Craig loves holding wooden sticks and bashing skin, which sounds worse than it is, although only slightly. His technique is firm, rhythmic and surprisingly sensitive.
Craig’s favourite cymbal is “all of them.” His favourite board game takes six hours and ruins Christmas.
Stu
Guitar
Stu was born on land but has spent much of his adult life attempting to return to the sea. Armed with a guitar in one hand and a scuba tank in the other, he is equally comfortable shredding a solo, descending into murky depths, or emerging from both looking damp, mysterious and faintly pleased with himself.
Many guitarists believe they are attractive to women. Stu does not believe this. Stu knows this, in much the same way that a man wearing a leopard print shirt in a rehearsal room knows he has made several brave life choices and intends to stand by every single one of them.
Stu’s favourite chord is probably classified. His favourite colour is leopard.
Stu lives in an undisclosed underwater lair, surfacing only for gigs, chips, and compliments from women who may or may not exist.